When it comes to the physical, emotional or
psychological aspects of your relationship, try
to allow your man to feel free, independent,
unthreatened, challenged, in control, and
content.
Why do some guys lose interest when things
seem to be going so well? Here are a few
thoughts that might help you make some
adjustments that could help you increase his
attention span.
1. Too Easy:
Guys definitely thrive on conquest. But, if the
wooly mammoth just followed the hunter home
and jumped on his barbecue pit, it would not
have tasted so sweet, and the celebration
surrounding the feast would be short and
boring.
The hunt is what gives significant value to the
conquest. Men believe that anything worth
having is worth working hard for or even
fighting for.
Things gained too easily don’t carry a high
value. You would have never seen a squirrel’s
head hanging on a cave wall, but you might
have seen the head of a saber-toothed tiger.
Give the sexual tension a chance to build so
your amazing gift can be appreciated more
fully and with a bigger burst of delight for your
man. Sure, sometimes the mood can be
magnetic and the time can be right early on,
so go ahead and capture the magic of the
moment. Just make him wait an extra date or
two for the encore.
2. Too Serious:
Women often look for a solid provider and
protector, and then they will choose one who
is also a good playmate. Men look for a fun
playmate. They will eventually zero in on one
who can also challenge them and complete
them in other ways.
Early on, men are captivated and blown away
by the wonderland of your femininity. They
don’t fall in love the same way you do or for
the same reasons.
You may be ready to take the emotional
aspect of the relationship to the next level, but
he’s still enjoying the honeymoon. You may be
ready for him to move in and begin a
commitment, but you’re getting way ahead of
where his head is at.
He may be ready too, but he doesn’t know it
yet. Until he figures out for himself that he
needs you and that you have become a
necessary part of him, your love and tightening
grip will seem like a trap, a prison and the end
of freedom and life as he knows it. He will get
scared and run away.
Once he’s had his “Aha” moment, he will see
the commitment of love for the paradise it is,
and he will gladly join you there. Don’t move
too fast, even if he says he loves you.
3. Too Controlling:
Men are independent creatures by nature.
They may appreciate a little fashion advice, if
it doesn’t change their self-image. But they
don’t want you to schedule their itinerary for
them.
They don’t want to be expected to show up
someplace for you without proper notice and
their approval. They don’t want their cave to
be redecorated into someone else’s concept of
good living. They don’t want to swap their
French fries for baby carrots, and they don’t
even want to know why they should.
Imagine that you met a prince and just wanted
to go out with him. Well, the palace guard
comes to your place and takes over. They
replace everything in your closet with snobbish
attire. They cut your fingernails and remove
the cute little designs in favor of cherry red
polish to match your new required lipstick.
Your piercing jewelry is discarded, your little
butterfly tattoo is removed, your gold necklace
is replaced with pearls, and your hair is
chopped into a bob with no highlights.
All you wanted was to kiss the cute guy and
maybe pull his pants down, but you never
bargained for anything like this. Men are
trainable. You just have to ease into the
adjustments. If you tighten the bolts too hard
or too fast, you’ll strip the nuts and they’ll fall
off. Ouch.
4. Too Scary:
They made a movie about how to lose a guy in
10 days. Sometimes a woman’s habits or
actions send up too many red flags, and a guy
just has to scamper away. Too much talk
about your ex, describing what your babies will
look like, or being too needy and clingy are not
only red flags, they’re kind of creepy. It’s hard
to hold back all of your amazing qualities, but
sometimes it’s for the best.
5. No Spark:
Romance is a two-way street. You have to like
him, and he has to like you. Remember that
men are often attracted first by the candy, and
then they learn to appreciate the woman that
you are.
It should be no surprise, then, that things may
begin with a lot of excitement and heat, both
of which can fade quickly.
His natural instincts tell him that the hunt
ends with the conquest, so it is up to you to
show him another dimension of your value as
a partner that will keep him interested. Still,
not all relationships are meant to be. Your
traits and interests that are perfect for one
man may mean nothing to the next.
The bottom line is that you want as many
things as possible to pull your man closer to
you and as few things to drive him away.
When it comes to the physical, emotional or
psychological aspects of your relationship, try
to allow your man to feel free, independent,
unthreatened, challenged, in control, and
content.
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